So focused on my other blog, I recognize and acknowledge my lack of attention here.
In actuality, while absorbed in the lofty thoughts of heart by night, my days have been methodically constructed around carpentry projects, hour by hour, just doing the work. In completing projects with my own dirty and recalloused hands, I better understand my problems when at the lead of a much larger business. 
To really be effective in any endeavor, there must be an element of fun. Responsible for the livelihood of 6 to 10 others, the overwhelming pressure to find work and produce it efficiently under mounting debt smothered rare moments of satisfaction and enjoyment. There was no time for pride or celebration.
In these past months, I have been working alone, or alongside friends who need the help and guidance to improve their homes. In addition to earnings without liability beyond my own two hands, I am able to rediscover the pleasure, sweeping up at the end of the day, of a job well done, day by day, hour by hour. There is an exquisite moment, just before driving off into the homelife, of accomplishment, of plans working out, of measurable progress.
Usually distracted in my life by larger concerns of family, our own home and mortgage, dreams of vacations, and even bigger dreams of someday being the Writer I always wanted to be, the actual tasks of carpentry have been, for me, but means to an end. Not really in stride with the tools in hand, I could recite the adage “measure twice, cut once”, even go through the motions of measuring a third time (having been interrupted by a question), and still get the cut wrong.
Better to leave the carpentry to the ones who really want to do it, I thought, and focused on design and sales. I drew great plans, supported by charts and spreadsheets that no one else actually understood as clearly, and in a booming economy, hired any guy with tools who answered the desperate ads to fill crews to finish all the jobs I could get started.
No matter the impressive portfolio that was built, so very little of it turned out to be any fun.
I miss the big projects, the large and beautiful additions, the buzz of activity on job sites, the line of pick-ups parked in the yard. Honestly, I really enjoyed driving up to answer questions, point fingers, and run off to attend to another site. I tried to be clear that I did not have all the answers, that I was just a facilitator, part of a team, but the truth is that the job needs a leader, someone in touch with every detail, someone who can prevent mistakes, and fixes them quickly with authority, demanding accountability when they happen anyway.
Today, I finish a kitchen. I have installed every cabinet, set every screw, laid every piece of flooring. The job is not perfect if one looks closely enough. I know where the scratches are and the excessive caulk that filled a gap. Even so, my friends will enjoy years of meals here, watch their grandchildren grow. Many, many more scratches will appear. 
More importantly, although I would love to redo a couple of measurements and cuts, I will remember this kitchen fondly, the feeling each day of contentment and the tools in hand.
And wouldn’t you know, last night in a casual conversation about something else, I was asked to design an addition.
